The Short Version of the Short Version

Have you ever had a really, really cool story to tell, but that story is so big and so deep and so tall that there's no way to tell it; no way at all? (Name that book...)

Well, that is exactly how this is.  

And that is why I have procrastinated telling it for almost a month.  Well, that and the fact that no matter how I tell it, the pure awesomeness of the story wouldn't come through.  Oh, and the fact that even the short version wouldn't be short enough.  So, I'm going to give you the shortened version of the shortened version.  

We'll get through it together.  

We went to Seattle. 

We stayed with Rick and Jenny.  Rick and Jenny are two of our favorite people on earth.  We ate milkshakes every night and stayed up till the wee hours of the morning letting them kill us in board games and talking about things that I will take with me to my grave.  I cried a little when I had to leave. 

 (And I cried a little more on the airplane ride home when I almost missed my flight and then Cameron peed all over himself, and then pooped all over his spare outfit, and then threw up all over his blanket.  But it's cool, because those kinds of fumes in a closed airplane didn't bother anyone.  I'm surprised I didn't get mugged.)

Next, we drove to Lehi, Utah where we stayed with my brother and his wife and their adorable puppy Ruby.  I woke up in the morning to Brooklyn and Aubrey climbing in to bed with me in soaking wet pajamas.  When I asked them why they were wet they replied that they had been playing in the snow.  After I gave them a 10 minute lecture about how they are never, EVER to play outside without me knowing because strangers might take them, Brooklyn smartly replied, "But mom, we talked to the strangers, and they were really nice!"

Fantastic.

 While we were in the Provo area, I decided to take the kids to the Wildlife Museum at BYU.  

It rocked. their. world.

 Aubrey must have looked at the butterfly for at least 10 minutes.  

That's like a year in kid time.

On the way to the museum I told Brooklyn that she could have a piece of gum if she promised to spit it out and not swallow it.  Approximately 5 minutes into the drive she reported that her gum had fallen out of her mouth and was now lost.  After searching the car for it, I decided that she had swallowed it and just didn't want to admit it.  Nope.  It had indeed fallen out of her mouth.  

And into her hair.  

And that was the last time she got any gum.

 For Thanksgiving, we took advantage of Luke's time off at his University of Utah rotation and drove 2 hours to Richmond, Utah.  There, we ate an entire turkey, inhaled 15 pounds (no, really. 15 POUNDS) of mashed potatoes, rapidly consumed Grandma Skidmore's homemade rolls, carrots, jello, candied yams, stuffing, cranberry sauce, fruit salad, icecream, apple, and pumpkin pie.  

I'm still full.

After the Eating Olympics, we headed to Idaho Falls.  Idaho Falls is home to the best in-laws on the planet.  I lucked out. There's not a bad one in the bunch. 

 

My darling niece, Hannah, entertained the girls for hours and hours.  She even let Brooklyn raid her closet and try on every last one of her dance costumes.  My adorable nephew, Eli, tried to teach Brooklyn about modesty.  

It didn't take.     

 The girls were able to squeeze a dance class into their busy schedules, and as Luke put it, "Their legs flail as if independent from their bodies!"  And I realized once again that there is nothing cuter than a girl in a dance class.  Except two girls in a dance class. 

 After our delightful time in Idaho, we returned once again to the Great Salt Lake.  There we stayed with the cutest family imaginable. 

See what I mean!?!

Proof of their awesomeness: they live in a 3 story house in The Avenues, they have a rock climbing wall in their kitchen, they have a big screen theater with reclining theater seats, they have a swing in their bedroom, and they didn't kick us out of the house when Aubrey pooed in their broken toilet.  

I seriously want to be this girl when I grow up.

On the way home, we hit a children's museum (since we hadn't had enough fun already... sheesh!) and it was incredible.

 And then, on the last weekend of our trip, we were finally, FINALLY able to join in the Webb Family Christmas Party.  We've cried ourselves to sleep many a time over never having been able to make it.  This year, we made it.  And it lived up to it's reputation. 

We visited the temple to witness the Christmas lights (and almost froze to death in the process.)

 

I committed unforgivable crimes against fashion (which Luke felt the need to document).

 We stayed in a hotel for two nights and celebrated Christmas by playing Monopoly until 2 in the morning, going swimming, having dinner at Cracker Barrel, playing Minute-to-Win-It, doing a gift exchange, dressing our kids up like reindeer, and having a family talent show.  

The other families sang church hymns, and my kids sang a song by Ke$ha. 

And that, my friends, is the Short Version.